Exploring the wonders of no-talent celebs and making an attempt to understand why their face keeps showing up in the media

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Michael Lohan: Desperate Deadbeat.


(Photo thanks to celebritysmackblog.com)


Michael Lohan, why do you deserve to be famous?? You just got out of prison and you don't pay your child support! Obviously your ex wife and her two daughters are hot messes, but why should you gain fame over your daughter's life spiraling out of control?? We get it, Lindsay needs help. We didn't need your dumbass to tell us that.

Michael Lohan has taken it upon himself several times to reach out to the public to tell them that his fire-crotch daughter Lindsay Lohan needs help. Thanks, Michael, I couldn't tell by the mug-shots and posession charges plastered all over the newsstands. Idiot. Second of all, what the hell kind of help is that going to give to her? By telling the whole world how screwed up his PUBLICLY screwed up daughter is, he is doing nothing but probably pissing her off, and acting as a trigger for her to go score some more coke.

How am I supposed to help Lindsay Lohan? Why would I try? I have enough problems of my own. Oh, thanks for the heads up, Michael, I'm gonna go hop on a fuckin plane sraight to LA and personally throw your ginger kid's freckly ass right into rehab.

My Goddddd.

Michael Lohan is the most obnoxious man. He's spent much of Lindsay's childhood in the slammer, and feels that it's completely appropriate for him to publicly make statements not about how he is going to help his daughter, but how everybody else should. Shut up, Michael, you're a hypocrite.

Also, what's up with him hanging out with Jon Gosselin?? Jon, if you're trying to hold your own in your divorce battle, you should probably get the fuck away from Michael Lohan. Even though he isn't as decked out in Ed Hardy as you, he is a much bigger douchebag. Nobody wants to see Michael rubbing off on Jon. Next thing we know, Jon will be telling the world to help Mady with her new heroin addiction. Don't even get me started on the child support Jon would have to pay. He'd have to give up his whole Ed Hardy wardrobe to pay for one week!

Anyways, the point is that Michael Lohan should step back, and shut up. He wasn't involved in Lindsay's life before she publicly messed up, so why should he chime in now? The best help she can get is if your dumbass shuts up, and lets her get help quietly.

Go away, Michael Lohan.

No comments:

Post a Comment